Have you ever met someone who seems addicted to their own pain? Trauma may be what they know, or feel most comfortable with. Familiarity can be a false love - which is how we can become accustomed to keeping and tending our own little pain garden. Just like weeds, the stories in our pain garden are familiar, insidious, and help hold together the plot (as in story or the land we sow). It is why people joke around that "they married their mother" or why adult children of alcoholics sometimes unconsciously choose a partner with similar unpredictable behaviors in their adult life - it may be … [Read more...]
Writing Anxiety: Working With False Narratives
Have you ever compared your version of events with a good friend? A false narrative is a mental framework you use in order to interpret events that upon deeper investigation turn out to be untrue or skewed. The father of cognitive psychology, Ulric Neisser, wrote in the compendium Self-narratives: True and False, "Human beings exist through time, just as everything else does: One thing happens after another. But unlike anything else, people remember what happened to them – some of it, anyway. This is a remarkable achievement. The remarkable thing is not just that past events influence the … [Read more...]
Writing Anxiety: The Collective Unconscious Writing Prompt
The quote that inspired this writing prompt is from the journal Open Culture looking at Carl Jung and his analysis of Hitler. Carl Jung was a disciple of Freud who was focused on the understanding of the,"collective" unconscious (the myths, archetypes, repressed images and fantasies) encompassing the soul of humanity at large. We are in a weird place in terms of "humanity at large." The use of the word "unprecedented" is, well, unprecedented. And unprecedented things give us anxiety - the unknown territory and strangeness of the incomprehensible actions of others. How do we work with … [Read more...]
Writing Anxiety: Feeling Feral Writing Prompt
If I said to you, "he is a dog" you would know what I mean, right? Or that she eats like a horse. That kid has the strength of a lion. We use animals at metaphors for qualities that exist in both the animal and human world. We say, he crushed his workout like a beast, or she runs like a gazelle. It is a useful repertoire of metaphors, but there is a dark side to it also. A lot of our anxieties have to do with what I would call our "animal selves." We share our biology with animals - chimpanzees and humans share 99% of our DNA. We share biological functions - the need to sleep, eat, excrete, … [Read more...]
Writing Anxiety: The Monster Writing Prompt
If you haven't read about the roots of anxiety, you may want to read the Hold On To Your Story: Writing Anxiety post first. It is commonly thought that when ancient cartographers would get to the part of the map that had not been explored, and would write, "Here be Monsters." Why? Because a monster is basically an unknown thing - a place or being that is submerged, hidden, partially visible, uncategorizable, or alien. Map and globe makers would draw creatures that live in the ocean with parts of animals they recognized- a sea cow etc. because humans use what we have had experience with … [Read more...]
Hold On To Your Story: Writing Anxiety
Hold on to Your Story. Everyone has a story of anxiety. Whether it is the insidious all-encompassing generalized anxiety or based on a specific instance (a report due, public speaking, crossing a shaky bridge) we struggle with anxiety as part of human nature. National surveys estimate nearly one in five Americans over 18, and one in three teens ages 13 to 18, had an anxiety disorder during the past year. When I was a sophomore in college I had my first panic attack and since that point I have spent a large portion of my life navigating anxiety. With the rest of the world opening up … [Read more...]
Writing Prompt: Before & After
This writing prompt was inspired by the writer Masha Gessen. In her article To Be or Not to Be in the New York Review of Books she quotes Suketu Mehta, in his book Maximum City: "Each person’s life is dominated by a central event, which shapes and distorts everything that comes after it and, in retrospect, everything that came before. For me, it was going to live in America at the age of fourteen. It’s a difficult age at which to change countries. You haven’t quite finished growing up where you were and you’re never well in your skin in the one you’re moving to." I can think of a few … [Read more...]
Write the Change
It is very easy to feel like each day brings fundamental changes. In February 2020 I was in New York City enjoying my husband's birthday. In March 2020 I went into my job and was told not to have meetings in the conference rooms. The next day we were told to work from home. Today, the desk I sat at still has my name placard and personal items in the drawers but I may never go back. It is a moment frozen in time of a world with different rules. The Write the Change Challenge was created to document the changes you have noticed in your physical surrounding, attitudes, emotions, and make … [Read more...]
Write the Change Challenge: Prompt #4 INSIDE & OUTSIDE
In times of massive change it is always interesting to look back at the ways things have been in the past. One aspect of life that has changed dramatically is what is considered "Public" vs what is considered "Private." With the advent of larger homes, kids have their own rooms. With the internet, suddenly the inside of those rooms can be broadcast to everyone online. Traditionally the home was private, but with new technologies and the advent of Covid everything is scrambled. Previously, kids wouldn't know what all their classmate's homes looked like if they weren't in a Zoom classroom. … [Read more...]
Write the Change Challenge: Prompt #3 MIRRORING
The English word "mirror" comes from the Latin mirari, to wonder or marvel at. We see our reflection, and this prompt is an opportunity to write from that gaze. We spend time combing, powdering and plucking in an attempt to control our image. The mirror can be a tool with which we work to tune our reflection before stepping out of the house. It takes very little imagination to consider a woman's makeup to be her, "warpaint." There are large changes in culture right now - a second look at the presentations of the past, a pull to reconfigure our lens of the present, demands for new … [Read more...]
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